I gave you flowers so you’d have petals for your thorns

//

Everyone always leaves me in the end

//

She engulfs all that she touches 

I’m sorry I couldn’t keep loving her 

Is that what you’re telling people? 

I want to ask the new him you’ve brought over 

I don’t–I am a pool of liquor on a dirty floor 

//

I hoped to someday be oxygen fleeing your lungs 

I told you please don’t make me get violent 

Here’s my army of one in our two

Bedroom apartment you see me

Cornering you by locking the door

Don’t make me show you what I’ve learned

In 18 years behind closed ones

//

Does he see a monster behind this painted mask? 

Can they see my jaw is fracturing from the effort 

It takes to not be angry

What do you see? Can you think of me? 

I asked you if you’re capable of empathy once

I can turn it off at will. I keep it off most of the time.

Your eyes looked as dead as what we were supposed to keep watered

//

How can you call this love, my love, you are hurting me

You waged war in battles of silence 

But your tears had to be the loudest

//

Banging 

Crying 

Yelling 

Shut the fuck up 

Please you’re losing me 

I’m honestly not sorry

Stop

//

I drew lines and you colored over them 

Don’t treat me like a child

But how can you be a child 

When children are learning and growing 

//

Sweetheart, have you changed a day in your life?

//

So I left

The lavender, 

The poppies,

The zinnias, 

And the carnations 

In your birthday present tattooed to the back I stabbed

Along with the closure you didn’t take 

But will still blame me for never having